I’m super girl, and i just miss being me..

I got frustrated with myself..yeah..damn hell me then..
everything goes wrong with me lately, like tonight…

1. I left my friend’s apartment and left my wallet there, and realized when i was about entering the MRT station, meant: i needed my card to enter, which’s of course i couldn’t find it since it’s in my wallet, so i needed to buy coin but of course i couldn’t since all my money are in wallet
Frustrated i called him to go back to the place we left each other to give me some money, and of course he cursed me for he had to give all money in his pocket to me while he was having dinner appointment with friend, meant, he would have to ask the friend to pay the meal
2. No idea what in my mind was, i took the wrong train and didn’t realize until i arrived in the wrong station, while i was having dinner appointment with Leo which was waiting for me in cursing of my stupidity too
3. i lost my train’s coin in i don’t know somewhere, and of course i couldn’t get out the station and i bought new coin for it..damn hell

And now..i’m staring my laptop, updating my CV, but again got frustrated because i totally forgot my Linked in password, i even forgot my tweeter, also my gmail password..and ohh yea i also realized i even forgot my Indonesian cellphone’s number..my IM3 number..i forgot it..can you believe it?? gosh….
what d hell with me?

One says i’m in love (ohhh…i wish)
the other one says i’m in deep stress (ohh..damn hell)
if two closest men of mine give such different opinion, well..such totally opposite opinions, and me, the subject, doesn’t even understand what’s wrong with me..what should i do then..of course i say “none of you are right”..and of course each of them insists they are right, for they think the know me best

i got dizzy..i can’t sleep..and i can’t poo..i’m dizzy..
what i’m doing? i listen to this song out loud “yes..i’m strong, i’m super girl and i just miss being me”
the songs maybe not exactly the same i feel, but i do miss being me

It’s not suppose to feel
It’s not suppose to be like this
I’m not what I used to be
I feel that I can’t breathe
I feel that I can’t be my self
Strong when I’m alone

I’d try to get you out of my mind
& manytimes I try to step on the ground
but shape of you, taste of you, smell of you
Spinning in my head..
Goin crazy just because of you!!

Take me out of here!!!!, take me out of here!!!!
I’m not my self, not I used to be
Yes I am Strong, I wanna be a supergirl
Well,.. I just miss being me..

So long, I’ve blame my self dreamin’ ’bout you..
I don’t want to stop, cause I hate to be alone
Just tell me where you are

I’m looking for you at manyplace
Never bored asking people ’bout where you are
Hey!! Don’t you dare treat me me like you don’t know me
Now you’re out of my world, don’t know where to find you

Take me out of here!!!!, take me out of here!!!!
I’m not my self, not I used to be
Yes I am Strong, I must be a supergirl
Well,.. I just miss being..

OOO ooo that strong little girl, noo..
Don’t wanna be alone

You control me, you control me ooooo.
You control me, you control me.

The way you are, makes me don’t wanna go, won’t be alone anymore

Jar of Hearts

There are sometimes that the song just rhymes so right
rhymes so true
rhymes so damn perfect
Like this song, and i (of course) overheard to it..
Cannot help myself to listen like 20 times a day
Cannot help myself to imagine, if i could have a chance to sing it over someone face, yeah i have perfect imagination..
“Who do you think you are” -rolling my eyes, and waving my annoying hand-

Anyway..enjoy Jar of Hearts by Christina Perry, but i do also love the cover from a lil girl, Maddi Jane

I know I can’t take one more step towards you
Cause all that’s waiting is regret
And don’t you know I’m not your ghost anymore?
You lost the love
I loved the most

And I learned to live, half-alive
And now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you’re asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

And I learned to live, half-alive
And now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?

Dear, it took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises
And now you’re back
You don’t get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all

And who do you think you are?
Runnin round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?

nobody knows

smile..smile..could you cover this face?
smile..smile..could you hide all those fakes
smile..smile..could you turn the loser to be like a clown..
smile..smile..yes you are such a perfect mask…
and no one could ever discover what’s behind you..
what a truly actress…

-Balcony, when the night turns to dawn..fascinated by the magic of smile-

Prettiest Friend

Have you ever been like ‘poisoned’ by a song??

If you’ve never been..please do listen to this song, i bet you will..as i make my room mates and my fb friends addict to it, and make my best friend looked at me strangely while listening to it :p

This song..make me think that,  it’s not by words, but it’s with all you have and do, make me feel as the prettiest friend..and amazing just the way i am

and yeah..i overheard to it..like 20 times a day listen to the same song :p, Prettiest Friend by Jason Mraz

This is what I look like today
And I’m trying not to pull out my hair
I’m trying not to show it cause I’m far too shy to grow it back there
That’s probably why I like wearing hats
There’s no denying I’m deferring the facts
Avoiding confrontation
Lacks tact in a situation
Behind every line is a lesson yet to learn

But if you ask me
The feeling that I’m feeling is overwhelming
And oh it goes to show
I’ve so much to know

I wrote this for my prettiest friend
Who while trying not to prove that I care
Trying not to make all my moves in one motion and scare her away
Well she can’t see she’s making me crazy now
I don’t believe she knows she’s amazing how
She has me holding my breathe
So I’d never guess that I’m a none such unsuitable, suitable for her
But if you ask me
The feeling that I’m feeling is complimentary
And oh it goes to show
The moral of the story is boy loves girl
And so on the way that it unfolds is yet to be told
I know that I should be brave
Even pretty can be seen by the blind
I know that I cannot wait
Until the day we finally learn how to find each other
Redefining open minds
And if you ask me
The feeling that I’m feeling is overjoyed
And it’s golden, it goes to show then
The ending of this song should be left alone
And so on cause the way it unfolds is yet to be told

and i belong to?

I suddenly overheard You belong to me – LifeHouse

see the pyramids around the Nile
watch the sunrise from a tropic isle
just remember darling all the while
you belong to me

see the marketplace in old Angier
send me photographs and souvenirs
just remember when a dream appears
you belong to me

and I’ll be so alone without you
maybe you’ll be lonesome too

fly the ocean in a silver plane
see the jungle when it’s wet with rain
just remember till you’re home again
you belong to me

oh I’ll be so alone without you
maybe you’ll be lonesome too

fly the ocean in a silver plane
see the jungle when it’s wet with rain
just remember till you’re home again
you belong to me

you were there, stood and set me free to reach all my dreams and desire
you were there, supported and proud of me
you were there, said that you’d be waiting for me to you..
yes…you were

just smile…

I’m sleepless today
but i’m not sleepy
I hate when my dude discovers me and say “don’t lie to yourself” ( and i couldn’t even discover myself)

and now..I hate to think about this song

How to fight loneliness
Smile all the time
Shine your teeth to meaningless
And sharpen them with lies

And whatever is going down
Will you follow around
That’s how you fight loneliness

You laugh at every joke
Drag your blanket blindly
Fill your heart with smoke

And the first thing that you want
Will be the last thing you’ll ever need
That’s how you fight it

Just smile all the time
Just smile all the time
Just smile all the time
Just smile all the time

I have you..i’m not lonely..
and i don’t need any reason to smile..it’s my nature, ain’t i?and i’m a warm hearted! you know i am

ahh..yea..i don’t need any reason to smile (rrrrrr…..)

Till we ain’t stranger anymore

I’m listening to this song..and it’s been for many times today..hehehe
I love this song..

Remind me about some sweet memories of the past
Remind me about how beautiful it was
It’s just too much to describe..
better you listen this..may you catch how much i fell for this song :p
Bon Jovi – LeeAan Rimes

Till we ain\'t stranger anymore

It might be hard to be lovers
But it’s harder to be friends
Baby, pull down the covers
It’s time you let me in
Maybe light a couple candles
I’ll just go ahead and lock the door
If you just talk to me baby
Till we ain’t strangers anymore

Lay your head on my pillow
I sit beside you on the bed
Don’t you think its time we say
Some things we haven’t said
It ain’t too late to get back to that place
Back to where, we thought it was before
Why don’t you look at me
Till we ain’t strangers anymore

Sometimes it’s hard to love me
Sometimes it’s hard to love you too
I know it’s hard believing
That love can pull us through
It would be so easy
To live your life

With one foot out the door
Just hold me baby
Till we ain’t strangers anymore

It’s hard to find forgiveness
When we just turn out the light
It’s hard to say you’re sorry
When you can’t tell wrong from right
It would be so easy
To spend your whole damn life
Just keeping score
So let’s get down to it baby
There ain’t no need to lie

Tell me who you think you see
When you look into my eyes
Lets put our two hearts back together
And we’ll leave the broken pieces on the floor
Make love with me baby
Till we ain’t strangers anymore

We’re not strangers anymore
We’re not strangers
We’re not strangers anymore

when pride sounds kampret

A:”Harga diriku terluka Tin, egoku tercabik2, aku benci mereka yang lebih rendah dari aku memandang rendah ke aku, kasian ke aku. Egoku sakit, ngerasa kalah, kesombonganku rontok Tin”
B:”Aku tau aku bukan apa2 baginya, dia punya segala yang diperlukan untuk jadi sempurna, sedangkan aku ga pernah bisa jadi ‘cukup’ buat dia”
C:”Brengsek ga si Tin, itu cewek, munafik banget, maksud gw kalo nggak ya nggak, gw ga tolol2 amat buat ngeliat dan bersikap”

A:”Aku muak ngelihat dia limbung, ga punya pendirian, dan bukannya berfikir bener, malah nerima saran dari orang yang sama2 fake moralis nya”
B:”Sudahlah, dia memang lebih pantas dari aku yang ga pernah akan sanggup buat bahagiain dia dek”
C:”Brengseeeek..dia bilang mau menyendiri, taunya semalem dia jalan bareng cowok lain, anjiing”

Mau harga diri terluka karena merasa diri lebih baek tapi kenyataan malah terdepak mereka yang jelas2 ga lebih baek dari kita, Mau yang jelas2 tau diri ga pantes buat bersaing, atau mau orang yang terluka harga dirinya bukan karena comparison tapi jelas2 diinjak2 dengan sengaja, toh tiga2nya bawa penyakit jiwa, toh kenyataannya hasil akhirnya sama..hehehehe

Me: Jelas sakit ati..jelas mewek..tapi kan itu juga bukan itung2an matematis..meski mau diitung dengan model matematika apapun..let say kita jaaauhh lebih baek, lebih cerdas, lebih oke..dia ga ada apa2nya..dia ga lebih dari otak kosong..ga ada cerdas2 nya sama sekali..ga pantes..bajingan..pecun..ato hal busuk lainnya..
Tapi klo dia bahagia kita bisa apa?…iyaaa si…pasti pengen nyantet..wkwkwk..tp ya udah..dirasakan sebatas rasa, sebatas sakit..normal..ga usah sampe ngefek ke tindakan..karena personally menurutku justru merendahkan value kita sendiri, we’re just beautiful, in every side of us, no matter what they say. ya udah..i dont even think it’s important to explain how beautiful we are. nyakitin kalo tetap berusaha mempertahanin hal yang jelas2 pengen lepas.
Tapi jelas ada hal yang ga bakal bisa masuk list toleransi adalah ketika, well okay, i’ve done my best, take step as wise as i can dan tetaaaap, tertuduh macam2 terfitnah macam, tertusuk macam2, dan bahkan terteror macam2..duuh…ke laut ajaa deeeh kalo gitu..karena sampe dititik itu aku ga bakal diem, at least mulut jahat ku pasti akan nyamber, com’on it sounds like i share you my blood and you ask my life..ciiihh..ga tau diri..at this stage my pride could kill you, trust me!

Tapi lepas dari semua, toh entah A, B, C mau yang luka dalem, mau yang kekeuh harga diri, mau yang muak, toh masih pada kebayang2..nanananananana…
Apalagi yang sore2 twilight telp kayak orang kesurupan dan begitu keangkat cuma nyanyi lagu Anggun “Still reminds me of you’ dengan suara yang sumpah cempreeeeng sambil ngumpat2..hehehehe..
yaaah..this song dedicated for you my dear, sabaar..ke tukang format otak aja, tar ajak aku bareng, ato klo mau cari tukang santet kabar2..wkwkkwkwkwkwkkwk, yaah..there’s one day we’ll find love once again :p

this it it, Anggun: Still reminds me of you

I cut off my hair
Put some red on every nail on my feet
I think it’s pretty
I repainted all the rooms
Got a cat that I named June, obviously
I think she’s happy
Friends threw some parties
I’ve been to them all there’s not one that I missed

And I’ve tried to spend my time with somebody new
But everyone
Still reminds me of you
And tried to play some songs that change my point of view
But every sound
Still reminds me of you

I’ve done some walking
Listen to the people talk on the street
I don’t feel lonely
I saw some movies
But your face kept coming back on the screen
I think I’m crazy
Can’t make decisions
I could use some more distractions today

And I’ve tried to spend my time with somebody new
But everyone
Still reminds me of you
And tried to play some songs that change my point of view
But every sound
Still reminds me of you

I wonder where did I go wrong? What made you gone?
How I hate to feel alone

I’ve tried to spend my time with somebody new
But everyone
Still reminds me of you
And tried to play some songs that change my point of view
But every sound
Still reminds me of you
Still reminds me…

GO – Go away broken heart there’s no more space for your anger, no longer

Love Anggun’s song damn much.. it rhymes s rite to me..aiiih.. maksa.com :p

Search and search in You tube, unfortunately, i can only find this link, hihihi..think twice to post as it’s a lil bit HOT, so dont’ click if you are underage, or if you are oversexed , don’t focus on the video only, listen to the lyric, it’s great!!!

Go – by Anggun

Go away broken heart there’s no more space for your anger, no longer
Go away endless tears I’ve no patience for your sadness, I could careless
Go away far from here take all your belongings
Run as fast as you can, you won’t see me crying

Go away loneliness please stop yelling my name out loud, you’re not allowed
Go away wasted dreams you’re never welcomed in my head, my mind’s set
Go away far from here can’t stand you beside me
Run as fast as you can and don’t look back at me

After all those times, breathing for him
After all those lies, coming from him
After all those nights, unbelieving
After all those why’s, why didn’t I see
He’s not meant for me

Go away desperation now’s the time to leave me alone, on my own
Go away all regrets I never want to see you again, it’s your end
Go away far from here and back to where you come from
Run as fast as you can away from my home

After all those times, breathing for him
After all those lies, coming from him
After all those nights, unbelieving
After all those why’s, why did I fall
Why couldn’t I know ?
Why didn’t I see ?
Why o why did I love him ?

After all those times, now I feel better
After all those lies, I’ve no more anger
After all those nights, I’ve stopped to wonder
After all those why’s, I’ve learnt to let you go
I have let him go

Aku bukan duafa Cinta

Original title taken from forwarded email (Nggik’s email )
Too bad, i have no privilege to add a video format in this post

but you may click here to listen

Aku bukan pengemis cinta
Yang slalu harus mengalah
Bila diputuskan cinta
Dari sang kekasih

Wanita bukan engkau saja
Yang ada dalam dunia
Cantik bukanlah utama
Menghiasi jiwa

Persetan dengan cinta
Persetan dengan janji
Kalau harus menyakiti
Persetan dengan sumpah
Persetan dengan wajah
Kalau harus menderita

Aku bukan pengemis cinta
Yang slalu harus mengalah
Bila diputuskan cinta
Dari sang kekasih

Patah hati bukan sifatnya lelaki
Apalagi sampai nekat bunuh diri
Putus cinta itu soal yang biasa
Aku tak putus asa

Sumpah dan janji bukan satu yang pasti
Alasan hanya jadi tuntutan hati
Sudah sering kali kau sakiti hati
Aku tiada perduli

Jangan kau sangka aku akan menderita
Bila putus bercinta

Aku bukan pengemis cinta
Yang slalu harus mengalah
Bila diputuskan cinta
Dari sang kekasih

Patah hati bukan sifatnya lelaki
Apalagi sampai nekat bunuh diri
Putus cinta itu soal yang biasa
Aku tak putus asa

Sumpah dan janji bukan satu yang pasti
Alasan hanya jadi tuntutan hati
Sudah sering kali kau sakiti hati
Aku tiada perduli

Jangan kau sangka aku akan menderita
Bila putus bercinta

Aku bukan pengemis cinta
Yang slalu harus mengalah
Bila diputuskan cinta
Dari sang kekasih

definisi Anggik..”kereeen ya ini laki, ditinggal kabur bini, ga menye malah nantang, cowok mustinya kayak gini”

dan sama2 kita langsung ingat Anang..yg notabene ga banget ,

Sementar aku langsung ingat “Nggik Blog mu yg judulnya “X” itu, aku langsung ingat itu tiba2″ hehehe

I Hate You then I Love You

I’d like to run away from you
But if I were to leave you I would die
I’d like to break the chains you put around me
And yet I’ll never try

No matter what you do you drive me crazy
I’d rather be alone
But then I know my life would be so empty
As soon as you were gone

Impossible to live with you
But I could never live without you
For whatever you do
I never, never, never
Want to be in love with anyone but you

You make me sad
You make me strong
You make me mad
You make me long for you

You make me live
You make me die
You make me laugh
You make me cry for you

I hate you
Then I love you
Then I love you
Then I hate you
Then I love you more
For whatever you do
I never, never, never
Want to be in love with anyone but you

You treat me wrong
You treat me right
You let me be
You make me fight with you

You make me high
You bring me down
You set me free
You hold me bound to you

I hate you
Then I love you
Then I love you
Then I hate you
Then I love you more
For whatever you do
I never, never, never
Want to be in love with anyone but you

I never, never, never
I never, never, never
I never, never, never
Want to be in love with anyone but you
But you

huhuhuhuhuhu..
hate that i love you that way….

A Love That Will Last

Daleeeemmm..hmmmm..yeah, ‘Cause I want just one love to be enough :p

I want a little something more
Don’t want the middle or the one before
I don’t desire a complicated past
I want a love that will last

say that you love me
Say I’m the one
Don’t kiss and hug me and then try to run
I don’t do drama
My tears don’t fall fast
I want a love that will last

I don’t want a just a memory
give me forever
Don’t even think about saying good-bye
‘Cause I want just one love to be enough
And remain in my heart till I die

So call me romantic
Oh I guess that’s so
There’s something more that you oughta know
I’ll never leave you
So don’t even ask
I want a love that will last

Forever
I want a love that will last
I want a love that will last

So there’s just a little more that I need
I wanna share all the air that you breathe
I’m not the kinda girl to complicate the past
I want a love that will last

Forever
I want a love the love that last
Always
I just want a love that will last
Want a love that will last

A Love That Will Last

A Case of You

A case of you

Just before our love got lost you said,
“I am as constant as the northern star.”
and I said, “Constantly in the darkness
where’s that at?
If you want me I’ll be in the bar.”
On the back of a cartoon coaster
in the blue T.V. screen light
I drew a map of Canada
Oh Canada
with your face sketched on it twice.

In my blood like holy wine
you taste so bitter and so sweet
well, I could drink a case of you, darling
and I would still be on my feet
I would still be on my feet.

Oh I am a lonely painter
I live in a box of paints
I’m frightened by the devil
And I’m drawn to those ones that ain’t afraid.
I remember that time you told me
“Love is touching souls”
Surely you touched mine
‘Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time.

My blood
my holy wine
tastes so bitter and so sweet
Well I could drink a case of you, darling
and I would still be on my feet
I would still be on my feet

I met a woman
She had a mouth like yours
She knew your devils and your deeds
and she said, “Go to him, stay with him
but be prepared to bleed”

My blood
my holy wine
tastes so bitter and so sweet
Well I could drink a case of you, darling
and I would still be on my feet
I would still be on my feet

hmmm…a case of you, yeah..a case of you

Bukan Diriku..lah..trus siapaa??!siapa??! :p

Udah jalan dua minggu ini, selalu kebangun tiap jam 2-3an pagi

Kelop..kelop..kadang baca2, kadang doa, kadang liat TV, kadang juga mewek ga jelas, kalo meloyelomukalogelo nya kumat

Sampe akhirnya tadi pagi, jam udah nunjukin jam 4an kurang, teteupp bo..ga bisa juga tidur..dodol!, update FB udah (penting amaath..ihh)doa udah (ampe kadang takut, Tuhan bosen ga ya dengerin doaku yang itu2 aja?! ), akhirnya desperate nunggu kantuk datang lagi sambil nyetel TV (damn, I should have not done it )

Nonton TV jam segitu, gaa ada acara jelas, nonton Oprah show tentang lelaki2 selingkuh dan para wanita itu mengahapinya..booo’ selingkuh..diujung dunia bagian manapun..eksissss yak?! Trus pas Oprah dah kelar juga padahal ngantuk belom juga datang kutek2 channel TV dan sampailah ke RCTI (huhuhuhu..nyesel..nyesel!!!) yang nanyangin sinetron jadul jaman beheulah, yang bintangnya Baim Wong, Ririn, Betrand, argghh..it’s not about the ‘sinetron’ itself, but it’s about the soundtrack, “Bukan Diriku” by Samsons..

Bukan apa, ga nyenengin bangeeth aja, ngedengerin lagu ini di jam2 labil kuntil anak kayak gitu, bikin melo ga jelas, bikin mewek ga jelas, kupreth..karena ini lagu punya kenangan dodol banget, pernah nangis mewek di depan umum pas ada malam inagurasi kampus tahun 2006 (uhmm..Mei 2006), yang nangis banget2 karena waktu itu bandnya angkatan 2001 perform pake itu laga…aargh pas banget..huhuhuhu..

ahhh lagu..emang bisa bawa sejuta kenangan..dengan cara nya sendiri..kadang bikin senyum2 ga jelas, bikin nyengir, kerasa anget di ati, kadang bikin miris, kadang juga mewek kaya tadi..dududuudu..tapi sekarang aku udah sembuh kan??iyaa..jawab iya!! Iya kan??udah sembuh??!!ga ngaruh sama itu lagu lagi kan?!!bilang iya!!!tadi kan nangis cuma karena ngantuk ga bisa bubuk, padahal pengen bubu’..ahhh..iya..aku sudah sembuh!!dodol!!buktinya sekarang dengerin lagu itu berkali2..ga nangis lagi..ahhhh..

Samsons – Bukan Diriku

setelah kupahami

ku bukan yang terbaik

yang ada di hatimu

tak dapat kusangsikan

ternyata dirinyalah

yang mengerti kamu

bukanlah diriku

kini maafkanlah aku

bila ku menjadi bisu

kepada dirimu

bukan santunku terbungkam

hanya hatiku berbatas

tuk mengerti kamu

maafkanlah aku

reff:

walau kumasih mencintaimu

kuharus meninggalkanmu

kuharus melupakanmu

meski hatiku menyayangimu

nurani membutuhkanmu

kuharus merelakanmu

dan hanyalah dirimu

yang mampu memahamiku

yang dapat mengerti aku

ternyata dirinyalah

yang sanggup menyanjungmu

yang lama menyentuhmu

bukanlah diriku

Bukan siapa siapa

A song for father -who is our second God-

Tribute for a gud friend-Mas Reno-, my deeply condolence for your late father Mas

Pasti menyesakkan kehilangan ‘pegangan’ saat kita berusaha membuktikan pada dunia kita bisa

Saat kita berusaha sekuat hati mencoba memberikan secercah senyum dan bahagia di kerut wajah tua yang kita cintai

Semoga ketenangan bagi bliau di surge, dan ketabahan bagi keluarga mu dan dirimu agar terus senantiasa mencoba membuatnya tersenyum dari surga

Luv this song damn much..

i do always believe that Father, who is our second God, is responsible for our appearance on this earth and who has given us life to live.

He is not only responsible of giving us life but also behind our education, …growing up and also for everything which we needed in life. We really need to accept his contributions in making our life better and give a little effort to show him our gratitude towards his presence in our life before it could be too late for us

Luther Vandross-Dance With My Father Again

Back when I was a child, before life removed all the innocence

My father would lift me high and dance with my mother and me and then

Spin me around ’til I fell asleep

Then up the stairs he would carry me

And I knew for sure I was loved

If I could get another chance, another walk, another dance with him

I’d play a song that would never, ever end

How I’d love, love, love

To dance with my father again

When I and my mother would disagree

To get my way, I would run from her to him

He’d make me laugh just to comfort me

Then finally make me do just what my mama said

Later that night when I was asleep

He left a dollar under my sheet

Never dreamed that he would be gone from me

If I could steal one final glance, one final step, one final dance with him

I’d play a song that would never, ever end

‘Cause I’d love, love, love

To dance with my father again

Sometimes I’d listen outside her door

And I’d hear how my mother cried for him

I pray for her even more than me

I pray for her even more than me

I know I’m praying for much too much

But could you send back the only man she loved

I know you don’t do it usually

But dear Lord she’s dying

To dance with my father again

Every night I fall asleep and this is all I ever dream

Seandainya Aku Bisa Memilih – Then I Miss You So

Ingat banget dulu sering nyanyiin lagi ini bareng sama sahabat baek yang udah kayak saudara, Anja Fahreizi Iriani

Sahabat yang jadi satu2nya tempat curhat, yang ngerti jalan cerita hati dari A sampe Z

Yang bisa dipercaya menampung semuaaa cerita yang tak akan pernah diketahui yang lainnya..

Ketika  menyayangi seseorang tapi bahkan tak punya kuasa menunjukkan dihadapan umum

Ketika menjalani suatu kisah, tapi karena banyak hal harus rela berada di balik layar dan menjalani segala ketidak normalannya

Ketika sering menangis bercerita how bad I wanted to do some normal activities like other couple

Ketika musti menahan nyeri berada dipihak terpinggirkan, dan menerima berbagai konsekuensi penyiksaan batin..

Dan sekarang, betapa aku merindukanmu sahabat, ketika hidup sudah berputar

Ketika waktu memberikan banyak kejutan, jawaban dan memutar nasib di puncak kebahagian, dan menjerumuskan di lembah kesakitan, yang bahkan terasa nista

Merindukanmu, saat tiba2 pagi ini mendengar lagu ini terputar dari mp3

Merindukanmu sekarang saat air mata tak lagi tergenang, saat bahkan lupa bagaimana menangis semestinya

Dari jauh lubuk hatiku
Jiwaku resah mencari tahu
Apa yang sedang kurasakan kini

Terguncang aku mengingat engkau

Reff #
Seandainya aku masih bisa memilih
Akan
kupilih engkau sebagai kekasih sejatiku
Betapa semua harapan hanya untukmu
Akan kupahat
namamu dalam pusara hatiku

Kaulah rahasia terbesar hidupku
Yang takkan mungkin aku
ungkapkan
Kusimpan erat perasaanku
Meski ajal menantiku

*Seandainya Aku Bisa Memilih, by Padi